Tuesday, April 1, 2014

Retro Relationship Tip No. 2: Put Pen to Paper

Retro Tip #2: Put Pen to Paper

Lilia Fallgatter, author of The Most Important Letter You Will Ever Write: How to Tell Loved Ones How You Feel Before It's Too Late, advocates reviving the lost art of letter-writing to increase intimacy in a relationship.

"Love letters exchanged between a couple can strengthen their relationship by helping them to connect to one another on a deeper level," she says.

Hand written personal notes tucked in a stocking, sock, or "nighty" drawer can certainly spike up an intimate time together. Opening your brief case at work or a snack prepared with love is optimizing your potential for continued communication on just about every level of your relationship. Personally composed letters may also become treasured keepsakes that can be revisited and experienced anew each time they are read. You'll reap bonus points if you hand write it on beautiful paper and enclose a cherished memento such as a photograph or ticket stub from a movie you saw together. Sending an invitation for a special foot massage or rendezvous for dinner at your favorite place, tickets to a movie or play, whether sent by him or her insures constant contact and caring.

An excerpt from my first blog post explaining this series:

Could “Old Fashioned” practices offer greater longevity, pleasure, and stability to your marriage? Many relationship experts interviewed from a recent article that I expand upon here, respond with a resounding “YES.”

Today's married couples may be well advised to emulate some of the successful strategies of their happily married parents and grandparents –from maintaining same-sex friends to even sleeping in separate beds! “Baby boomers and younger generations got sold on the psychology of “being authentic” which unfortunately has given rise to assume permission to speak and treat each other with disrespect."

Two recently reissued books originally published in 1913; “Don’ts for Husbands and Don’ts for Wives” contain hundreds of tried-and-true tips for a happy marriage. Advice for wives includes such tidbits as; “don’t let him have to search the house for you after his day’s work. Listen for his latch-key and meet him on the threshold,” and “don’t bother your husband with chatter if he is tired.” And for husbands; “don’t hesitate to mention the fact when you think that your wife looks exceptionally nice,” and “don’t scowl or look severe; cultivate a pleasant expression.” Of course, all this goes without saying, life is a two way street. So for our initial Retro Relationship Tip:

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